What’s that, you’re saying if I pray, then I will have an encounter with God?
That’s brilliant. So how do I pray? This is how I pray? I thought I had to put my hands together and always kneel. Oh, it’s not essential. OK, so this is how I do it. Right.
What’s that? I have to do it every day? OK. I’ll see how that goes.
Well, it was alright on Tuesday, but I kinda lost the flow on Wednesday. Then I kinda forgot on Thursday. Yeah, I haven’t really done it since then. I feel awful, does that mean God doesn’t love me anymore? It doesn’t? He still loves me? Well that’s alright, I suppose. I’ll try harder, I promise I’ll do better.
Wellllllll …. I really tried hard last week. I remembered on Monday and Tuesday and did my best on Wednesday too, but then I had some bad news late on Thursday and to be honest, I blew it again. I tried, but it was just so difficult. I know what you said about God forgiving me if I confessed to Him, but it’s so hard. It’s like I take two steps forward and then go back three steps. It just feels hopeless. I feel hopeless. Maybe I just can’t do this.
Eh? What’s that? My sense of inadequacy is understandable? This is a process of truly knowing what God in Christ has done for me and what that means for who I am in Christ as a result? So I need to be renwing my mind all the time? All the time? Why? Oh of course. That’s where I’m going wrong. You’re right, it is too easy to fall back into old habits and old ways of thinking. You’re right, it is too easy for me to do things for God in my own strength.
Ongoing renewal is what I need for this then. I just need to renew my mind to see what God says about this prayer situation.
Too right easier said than done. But at least I don’t have to remain defeated, there’s always hope, there’s always a redeemer, there’s always the truth of living by his will … as long as mind renewal keeps going.
(Photo by Esther Wilhelmsson on Unsplash)
For His Name’s Sake
Shalom
C. L. J. Dryden
Life With CD 