The Marks: 04 Take Delight in Giving Honour

There is something good in taking the credit for a job well done. It is good to be recognised and acknolwedged. As well as that though, there’s something in the ego that feels really good about being the centre of attention just for a moment.

Sure there are those self-effacing types who find it hard to take compliments, but even those types have a little pleasure inside at being seen for being just a little bit great.

Whereas being deferential is seen in some cultures as a bit weak. Something from a bygone era where there were masters to be revered and servants to do the revering. There’s a hang-up with that. It doesn’t feel particularly helpful in boosting the ego. It sometimes feels a little demeaning. After all, they’re not better than I am. I don’t need to make them feel that way by giving them little pep ups.

What makes a follower of Jesus, though, is the delight they take in honouring others especially those in the family of faith. As recipients of the love of Jesus, it’s part of expressing that which considers the other before looking at the self. Honouring others is good to remind ourselves that we are not the centre of attention. Jesus is and gives us the chance to express that by how we treat other image bearers. Honouring them is not something done grudgingly or out of strict duty. It’s heart-felt.

What does it mean to honour others and what does this outdo each other in honouring others look like?

Respect is a good thing – honour is the the step above respect. Respect opens the door for someone else as you walk in first. Honour leaves the door open for the other to walk in first. Respect is ensuring everyone has their meal. Honour is ensuring everyone has their meal before you start yours. Respect has us in the same kind of comfortable chair. Honour looks to give you the better chair.

Honour declares in action just how highly you value the other. The community of those who follow Jesus display to each other as a matter of the norm. It’s different to the normal mind-set of the world where our own comfort and desire for self-gratification is seen almost as a right. Disciples of Jesus live the face-to-face life where consideration is about how the one we see can be appreciated as a brother or sister in the family of the Most High.

If that is the focus of our interactions, no wonder there;s a drive to outdo each other. That drive comes as we bear witness to how we are recipients from other saints who are keen practitioners of honouring us. It’s not for us to bathe in the honour others give to us. We’re far too concerned that others are recipient of the honuor we know compels us to love each other.

Let’s also be clear, this is not ‘brown-nosing’ or ‘sucking up’ to others as though we’ve got something to gain by that exercise. Honouring others is not partaking in the act of flattery. We are not massaging the ego of someone else as a down payment so we can collect something from them later on. The desire to honour the other is an act of what is right in itself.

Taking away the whole ‘rub my back and I’ll rub yours’ mentality also means theres no need for scepticism, suspicion or cynicism to be around people who just love to honour others. There is no need to be guarded and wary of others. We don’t have to feel like we’re being used or worse abused. We are forgiven, we are loved, we are cleansed and we are clothed with rich robes we didn’t deserve, but God takes pleasure in ensuring we look the best to operate in His splendid gifts for the benefit of others. Great honour has been bestowed on us to be recipients of the love of the Creator of the universe. Operating in a culture of outdoing each other in honouring others gives us the environment to express something of the way God does things. It might be counter-intuitive at first, but when we appreciate just who God is and who we are in the light of His grace and mercy, it will be the most obvious thing to do to each other.

Just consider some of the ways in which that honour can be expressed …

It’s an honour – giving a card with words of thanks randomly.

It’s an honour – preparing a meal for someone along with their favourite dessert.

It’s an honour – being around to offer moral support while someone is undergoing an operation.

It’s an honour – making a phone call to listen to someone share how their day was whilst offering words of assurance, understanding, gentle humour and appreciation.

It’s an honour – driving someone to an important appointment and being on hand to return them hom.

It’s an honour – getting the shopping done for someone who is unable to do it.

It’s an honour – sharing experiences that can help another in study or in a workplace.

It’s an honour – providing a glowing reference for someone in need.

It’s an honour – supplying the funds for someone to get something to eat, or get something to wear or get a new business or get a new vehicle or get a new home.

It’s an honour – substituting for someone that enables them to get much needed time to rest and recuperate.

It’s an honour – getting the laundry done or even the dishes

It’s an honour – purchasing two tickets to that event your friend always wanted to attend and letting them choose their plus one.

It’s an honour – putting on a celebration for that academic achievement or passing that driving test or getting that new job or just because it’s Thursday.

Once the ball gets rolling in terms of how others can be honoured it can gather momentum that just keeps rolling and rolling as we look to bless the other as we have been blessed. The beauty of this honouring thing is that all you need is to have a relationship with someone. They don’t have to live up to any qualifications or status. They just need to be alive to receive and you can crack on with taking delight in honour the other.

That is the mark of a true Christian.

(This blog series was inspired by the Christian meditation on The Marks of a True Christian from the Encounter podcast.)

(Photo by Jen Theodore on Unsplash)

For His Name’s Sake

Shalom

C. L. J. Dryden