That would be ideal.
And that ideal seemed so far away. He could understand why his children argued, because much as he tried, he couldn’t help getting into arguments with his wife as well. He tried his best to remain civil. He tried his best to count to ten and bite his lip. But she just had to say something and he would let his rip verbally. They would have a lot to exchange with each other aggressively, before letting the matter rest for the time being. They had to at least put on the show of contentment in front of the children. That ideal seemed so far away. Maybe it wasn’t just an ideal, maybe it was a fantasy.
That would be ideal.
And that ideal seemed so far away. She could see why her daughter was sullen and closed, because she too tended to be sullen and closed. Especially after the way the marriage broke up. The way he deceived her and how she discovered the truth of his infidelity. She felt she looked like a fool. Others seemed to know and she looked to be the last to know. The friends that they shared seemed to shun her and sympathise with him. When she needed help the most, it was nowhere to be found. And he just went off with that so-called friend – leaving her in the lurch to look after their ten-year-old daughter. That was three years ago and ever since then it had been just the two of them against the world. She tried her best to get her baby-girl to be communicative and cooperative, but it did no good. She couldn’t blame her though. That ideal seemed so far away. Maybe it wasn’t just an ideal. Maybe it was a fantasy.
How they discovered that it wasn’t a fantasy and that it was an ideal worth pursuing was in the community of faith. There they saw real people going through real struggles and learning to live by the vision of a flourishing family that God outlined throughout the stories of other families in scripture who likewise went through real struggles.
It was reassuring to see that virtually every family in scripture was fractured in some way. Drunk fathers, manipulative mothers, sibling rivalry that gave birth to nations feuding with each other for decades. And these featured individuals who were commended by God for great acts of faith. Yet throughout those narratives of disaster and brokenness, God still wrote out the vision of a flourishing family. Not only did He write it but expressed it in how He looked after His bride and He engaged with His Son and how He supported the Son in His own relationship with His Bride.
This is why the vision of the flourishing family has wisdom for fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, brothers and sisters and husbands and wives. Wisdom for recovering when marriages are broken. Wisdom for rebuilding when parents fail. Wisdom for restoration when relationships are strained. Wisdom for relating well in loving relationships with the necessary tensions. Wisdom to see life when trust conquers betrayal. Wisdom to see life when forgiveness triumphs over bitterness. Wisdom to see life when harmony and co-operation has the victory over selfishness and divisive ambition.
This vision of the flourishing family culminates in a picture of a marriage feast. Where a marriage and glorious family reunion fills a new heaven and earth with the wonder of the love, peace, righteousness and joy that marks the world when the family flourishes.
And that vision is not something to wait to be fulfilled in the there and then. It’s a vision that can help in the here and now. It’s a vision that the community of faith look to in gaining wisdom for the challenges of today. It gives the living hope to help people in every stage of the family life. It helps people to look at the vision and not be duped into thinking it’s just a fantasy. It gets people considering the beauty of God’s flourishing vision for the family and saying with reassurance:
That will be ideal.
(Photo by Tyler Nix on Unsplash)
For His Name’s Sake
Shalom
C. L. J. Dryden
Life With CD 