When they got married, one of their parents prayed a simple prayer.
Dear Lord, let us delight to see this marriage work through the many challenges and thrive through the setbacks and disappointments.
The union was fruitful in that they had three children in rather quick succession. Barely five years covered the first to the last.
They spent those twenty-five years doing their utmost to ensure that the children had a stable and strong upbringing. They worked hard in the week, attended all the musical recitals and the school plays. They made sure they worked with the teachers for the educational development of the children. At the same time they only looked to support their children as they explored what it was they enjoyed doing. When the youngest one successfully got the grades necessary to go to university, it was then that they begun to appreciate the massive shift it would mean for their lives. All three children had left the nest either for university or to start their career elsewhere.
It would be the two of them.
Whenever their children asked them about it, they brushed it off lightly thinking they would be fine. Yet when the last born waved goodbye and they closed the door, the emptiness in the home felt vast. The silence seemed to scream at them – what are we supposed to do now?
No squabbling on the stairs. No more laughter in the kitchen. The family table would only occupied by two voices. What are we supposed to do now?
It would have been easy to dive into individual pursuits. Yet under that activity gnawed the issue that there should be more to married life than bringing up three beautiful children. What are we supposed to do now?
Eventually they couldn’t dodge the question any longer. They knew they loved each other, but what did that mean now? Was it worth having dreams and plans any more? Were they past that now? What are we supposed to do now?
It was when their eldest visited with the proposed significant other that they finally clicked on what they could do. Working through this new phase of life together could help them cumulate the wisdom and experience of those parenting years and be open and transparent about why they remained together to help other couples out at various stages of the relationships. Whilst not putting them forwards as experts in marriage and family, they could certainly be a support to others in their relationships. And do this together as they also worked through life in this new phase.
The driving factor behind this was what they discovered when they sat across from each other one evening. In each others eyes they saw that the love that had allowed them to enjoy those years together was more than their own efforts. They acknowledged if it was not for the love of God in their lives, their marriage would have collapsed or worse, just be a sham arrangement of convenience.
The love of God for them and that love they then gave for each other became the bedrock for the help they offered not just to their children as they entered that stage of relationship, but to others who noted that they made themselves available to help.
As well as the love of God as the bedrock, they also committed to redouble their efforts to do one thing for each couple – pray.
Pray that each couple would communicate with each other in love and recognise that communicating with God would be essential to the relationship thriving.
It was their delight to see marriages work through the many challenges and thrive through the setbacks and disappointments.
(Photo by Samantha Gades on Unsplash)
For His Name’s Sake
Shalom
C. L. J. Dryden
Life With CD 