Highlighting what’s wrong can be very easy.
Talking about what’s wrong once it’s been highlighted can also be very easy.
Banging on about it can also be something that requires little effort.
It was the umpteenth time I’d sat through the service taking place the same way that it had happened time and and time again before. When my wife and I got in the car I was ready to play the same tune she had to endure time and again about me banging on about what was wrong. I was all set and ready to trumpet about it, when on this occasion my wife in advance gave me That Look.
Now as you may or may not know wives are equipped with several gestures and postures that communicate instant messages to husbands which are quick to understand. There is The Stare, The Glare, The Grimace, The Puppy-Dog Eyes, The Look and of course there is That Look.
The difference between The Look and That Look is that with The Look you’ve done something wrong and she’s about to tell you off unless you get there first. That Look is when you’re in trouble and she genuinely wants you to help yourself out of it for your own sake. (Of course this is as opposed to The Glare where you are in big trouble and she wants you to pray for mercy from God because it’s unlikely she’ll have any spare.)
So being the recipient of That Look I stopped to consider what trouble I was in. It was there in That Look that my wife displayed the love of Christ in asking me to consider what I was about to say. Was I contributing to the light or was I just complaining about the darkness?
Quick fixes don’t tend to happen regularly in scripture. For every reference of healings and miracles happening instantaneously, there appears to be equally deep nagging communal issues of faith, doubt, immorality, fear and other issues that required pastoral/apostolic care to attend to them. These issues would not go overnight. These required patient and diligent attention to Christ in making the changes slowly.
That Look from my wife was telling me that I needed to be prepared to partake and encourage others to partake in those changes slowly. Develop the relationships, build the sense of community, take the time to understand and serve people and those who will come can come and explore the word together. Then in the fullness of time as the plant takes root and the nutrients feeds it, the growth can take place with the harmful, unnecessary ways being replaced slowly by the necessary, fruitful ways.
This was not just theory either. Our relationship as husband and wife was proof of that. Other key relationships in my life were also proof positive that over time, with intentional input, changes can emerge and the godly foundation can bring about some fruit. That happens when we’re committed to walking in the light together, as Christ is in the light. Not criticising others, but rather giving opportunities to explore truth together.
Yes, it’s amazing what can be said with a look, or rather That Look. I hope I don’t have to get it too much more often to catch up with the hint that God isn’t looking for those who can highlight and bang on about it. He’s looking for those who can partake in the alternative however slow that process might take.
For His Name’s Sake
Shalom
C. L. J. Dryden
Life With CD 