Being Authentic

It is very interesting considering how we have been conditioned.

Sometimes I hear people speak in such a way as to suggest that their way of thinking, believing and behaving is objectively correct.  Such is their ignorance to the way in which they have been conditioned by society, the oblivious way in which they hammer it in with every statement can be rather humorous (as well as sad).

That is why it is refreshing, in the light of getting to know God through Jesus, that he allows us to get to know ourselves.  See ourselves for who we really are in the light of Him.  As that light shines into us, it does pick out the way we have been conditioned.

For example, the other day I was speaking with a colleague.  He related how he had to be different person at work, to the one at home, because he needed to abide by the professional standards of the place of work.  If he was being authentically him, he would not be able to get his job done, and people would not understand him, because of his eclectic, eccentric and spiritually sensitive nature.  As a result he had learnt to close those parts to himself and conform to the required standard of his workplace.  Only now the tension was really getting to him.  He knew the script, but it felt as though he was living a lie by day and suffering for it at the night.  Almost as though he had a split personality.

It was sad hearing my colleague, only because I knew very well what he was talking about.  It can be even worse if you are a member of a church, because it can appear at times as though you require three personas – one for work, one for church and the real you.  Having endured something like that myself for the best part of a dozen years, I am fairly acquainted with the strain that puts on you and the consequences for close and valued relationships.

It might very well be easy for the confident and brash types to out themselves across as though they are who they and what you see is what you get.  Yet even they are not always honest with themselves or those they relate to in different walks of life.  It is as though the society and culture in which they live defines a certain way of behaving and displaying character that forbids, shuns and shames those who seek to do otherwise.  Of course the reality is that there is so much more to the beautiful diversity of humanity than what is expected in certain sub-cultures, and the bid to repress that for a process and designated outcome has got to be up there in the definition of dehumanise.

Learning, embracing and living in humility is a liberating pursuit.  For here God-given wisdom allows us to know who we are in God’s eyes and then behave accordingly in any given situation being true to God and ourselves.  Never looking to be men-pleasers, but at the same time not being insensitive to how our behaviour affects others.  It is a fine balance, that is why God-given wisdom is essential.  It allows us to not take ourselves too seriously, whilst never being disrespected and devalued in our own eyes because of the thoughts, deeds and words of others.

This I know partly through experience and essentially through seeing it lived out in the lives of people I consider to be great.  They are great, not because they are perfect, but exactly because they know what it is to be authentic.  Aware of their flaws, aware of their environment and aware of their identity in Christ, walking boldly in that.

Among prayers that I offer, there is still a special one to me offered up for myself and others who have struggled and might still be struggling in being free to live in integrity and no longer living double, or triple lives.  A refreshing aspect of Jesus’ personality was that He evidently did not need to conform to social niceties, even as He still walked in meekness and humility.  He could be authentic with children or religious rulers, prostitutes or Pontius Pilate.  My prayer is that the same freedom can be afforded to others.

For His Name’s Sake

Shalom

C. L. J. Dryden