Being Dad

When I read back on some of the things I’ve said in this blog, I recognise that I can run the risk of sounding rather pompous, long-winded, pious and talking out of particular orifice not created for conversation. I really don’t take myself too seriously though, however ‘deep’ or ‘heavy’ some of these posts tend to be. In fact in the last year or two I’ve been able to be a bit lighter on myself.

A great help in that regard has been my ‘role’ as Dad to my three daughters. When a new child comes on the scene it tends to mess up the previously settled status quo. When you add two huge moves in the space of a year as well, it would be understandable for the family to be rather unsettled indeed. God in His wondrous generosity and care, however, has made it so that despite the upheaval there has remained a love and close bond among us as a family. Especially in regard to the treatment of Zoë, her two older sisters have rallied around her to protect her in her first months on the planet.

All three keep me grounded and balanced to a degree by the demands they make on my time and how they need me to behave. I can’t be serious all the time or that will affect them. I can’t be distant as that will affect them. I can’t be too involved as that will affect them. When I engage with them on a level and can make them laugh and have fun, as well as convey the reality of God in example and the importance of certain characteristics, then I’m getting the balance just about right. That means I can afford to laugh at myself and let them laugh at Dad as well, whilst also let them understand that there is ‘that line’ which they must not cross for fear of negative reprisals.

Since we moved to Bletchley I haven’t been able to take Deborah and Abigail to the new school they started in September, or collect them from school due to my work commitments. Today, however, because of personal issues, I had to come home earlier to collect them from school and it was good to do that. Those simple things (not little, you’ll notice, just simple) are what I love about fatherhood. I loved taking them to and from school back in Little Hulton and in Stoke-on-Trent. I enjoyed the walk and the talk and catching up with them and listening to Deborah in particular go on and on and on.

Being able to do that was great fun and with it being Thursday – my favourite day in the week – I was also able to give them a big treat. That was taking them to Bletchley Library for the first time, so now they’ve signed up for their library card (OK I actually did the singing, but they’re members now and that’s the main thing). They are at an age now where they can take the reading a bit more seriously beyond just looking at the pictures. Of course being the voracious reader I am it made sense as well for them to see their Dad getting connected again with the wonderful world of words and they pick up on that. Yet they are children and are as much there for fun as they are for reading. I liked taking them to have their fun and then their little bit more treat afterwards.

All that to say, I am so grateful to be a Dad. That God should see it fit for me to father these beautiful girls and be their first model of manhood is an honour and serious responsibility that helps me get proper perspective on issues of life. As I was saying to a dear friend recently, it’s the reason why I do this blog, as well, in terms of leaving a legacy for them and their children to get an insight into what makes their Dad who He is, how much I owe to my heavenly Father and how that connection equips and enables me to love in whatever positive ways I manage to do that.

My hope continues to be that these girls will grow up in the fear and knowledge of the love of God and see that lived out in the lives of their parents and embrace it for themselves in their daily reality with no pomp or ceremony, but with passion and excitement. I hope they will see the motor that moves us along and the desire of our hearts is Jesus Christ and without Him fun doesn’t make sense and joy is empty. I hope they see that with Him life is worth living and can be lived beyond their wildest dreams. That’s the hope and I reckon that will be fulfilled.

For His Name’s Sake

Shalom

dmcd